Today I opened the CNN page to find a headline that said "Oprah for President?"
I then ran down the hallway, shrieking "NONONONONONONONONONO!"
I have a deep secret. I hate Oprah Winfrey. There. I said it. I HATE OPRAH WINFREY! I don't understand why everyone goes ga-ga over her. She's so loud and so opinionated (UNLIKE me, HA!). She never lets her guests get a word in edgewise. She's never been married, never had kids, but she's an expert on marriage and parenting. She spouts off all this quasi-intellectual drivel and women eat it up! I have read some of her book club books and they were terrible! Her guests, and audience members, fawn all over and you can practically see her head inflate! Dope-rah is always spouting off this weirdo spiritual stuff, under the guise of Christianity, and then acting totally the opposite.
Too bad I don't have any strong feelings about this.
Anyway, I didn't even read the story, but it got me thinking - what would this country be like if Dope-rah were in charge?
First, President Winfrey would probably have Vice President McGraw. Or Vice President King. Either way, I don't want any of those people in charge in the event of a world catastrophe. Their answer to solving the world's problems would be to sit with Maya Angelou and sing "Kumbaya."
AND, Dope-rah's all about spending. Spend, spend, spend. Does our already staggering deficit need Dope-rah to buy everyone a Volkswagen Beetle and some Spanx?
She insists on being on every cover of her magazine. Can the woman EVER close her mouth, even for a picture?
She thinks she knows everything. Al Gore already claimed that he invented the internet, so what will she take credit for? LED Christmas lights?
Can she think about anything other than herself? We need someone in charge that is not thinking about their secret lesbian lover or her dogs.
If she was president, would she shout like this every time anyone "high profile" came over?
Just say NO to Dope-rah Winfrey!